Monday, October 10, 2011

Oh, It's My Kid

Today, I had one of those experiences as a mom that you hope does not happen to you.

I was at work, watching all the two year olds run around the gym bumping into each other, falling over, and getting back up again. The lead teacher, who is also the Preschool Director, asked me a question.

"As a former teacher, what would you do if ...." and proceeded to ask how I would deal with a certain situation.

I love teacher questions and after thinking about it for a minute, I started to describe what I would do. In my mind, I knew what student she was referring to, and tried to frame my answer in a way that was general to the question asked.

Nothing I said was rocket science, I just explained the book I used to discuss cultural differences and also general discussions I had with students about accepting others.   Then I lowered my voice and said, "Is this about so-and-so?".  She nods and says yes, that some of the kids in the pre-k class were struggling with how to deal with a certain student. Feeling confident in my deductive reasoning, and still a little full of myself in being asked a teacher question. I began to talk about how I had been dealing with this very situation with my son, who is in the class. We had discussions at home about this very student and appropriate ways to respond.

That is when I notice the look on the Director's face.  Uh-Oh. It's my kid, isn't it?  She nods again.

Oh man. My kid is the one that is pointing out the physical size and shape of this student. He is the one explaining that the reason they had to add chairs to the bench is because this student is so big. It's my son that is refusing to play with him.

He's not being mean, in the way kids can be. He is just very matter of fact. But in pointing out that this student can't run, can't fit on the bench, that he doesn't want to play with him, he is being so very mean.

I've been so focused on my older son and hoping that he will fit in and be accepted in his new school. I've been praying for a friend for him and for a teacher who understands his unique personality.  Now, I need to turn my attention to my middle son and pray that he, who finds it so easy to fit in and make friends, will learn to be compassionate to others who are different then him.

I really didn't want it to be my kid.

1 comment:

Alisha said...

Please, do tell of your insights about what to say to the child. What do you emphasize, what do you ignore....