Wednesday, December 22, 2010

What does "vacation" mean?

As a stay-at-home mom, (which is a title I am not 100% in love with) I am struggling with what it means to be on vacation.  This summer a "vacation" meant cooking meals outside, washing dishes by lantern, getting fully dressed to use the bathroom, and packing and unpacking daily.  It seemed that I was doing most of my normal jobs, just in an outside environment. And as much as I like camping, really I do, it was exhausting.

Today starts my husband's vacation. He is home until the New Year, and that is very exciting. The boys are happy, I am happy, I think my husband is happy.  He doesn't have to go to work, no meetings, code writing, coffee breaks, lunch out with friends, bike rides on cool clear mornings.  He is home with us. Still un-showered, relaxing in the morning (he did get up with the boys this morning) and spending time with us.

But today as I explained on my way upstairs that I was going to take a nap. He asked, "Is this going to be a daily occurrence while I am on vacation?" I stopped, looked at him and asked, "What is a vacation for me?" Seriously, I want to know. Today, I drove the kids to a play-date, ran into 5 stores on Christmas related errands, picked them up by noon, drove home, did lunch & naps for the younger two, and then wanted to go lay down.

I can not explain the feeling I have when I go into my bedroom in the middle of the day. Close the blinds, turn off the monitor, turn up the sound machine, place a pillow over my head, and pull up the blanket.  It doesn't matter that Jack is up wondering what to do, Micah is in and out of his room doing something in the bathroom (I forgot to close the gate) and Finn is talking in his bed.  Brandon is home and I can check out for an hour (or two). It is a rare gift and one I absolutely love.

That is my vacation. That hour right there, where the dishes are still on the table, laundry is piled in the living room to fold, Christmas cards and crafts are still waiting to be finished, but I am in my room drifting off to sleep.  When I return to reality, dinner will need to be cooked, kids play-time will need to be supervised, and the list of things to do before the 24th is daunting.  I can't leave my job for vacation, my life is my job, and as much as I love my husband and my boys, I am in desperate need for a "vacation". 

So, if you call between the hours of 1-3 during the next week, chances are I will be unavailable.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

Oh, man. That is so true! The dishes, the laundry, the butts that need never stops, even for "vacation" days. Hope your nap was restful!