Thursday, January 8, 2009

There Goes My Plan

Today is the first day of our new childcare/work schedule.  In theory, it seems like a pretty good plan.  I leave for work before the boys wake up and Brandon stays home with them. He takes Jack to preschool, has some time with Micah, picks Jack up, makes lunch, then heads into work himself. The boys are not left alone, but my sister comes down and babysits them until I get home from work.  Brandon is happy because he doesn't have to work from home for a full day, my sister is happy because she doesn't have to rush to Seattle, and gets the best part of the day with the boys - nap time!

I have been looking forward to the idea. Knowing, Brandon wasn't going to be home until after the boys go to bed gave me a different mind set. We had an early dinner, nice playtime, got ready for bed, did our bedtime routine and were in bed by 7:00. Now it was my time. I can sit on the couch with my blanket and computer watching trash TV without a running commentary from Brandon. I have been looking forward to the next hour or so all day. This was going to be my alone time - something I very much crave.

Jack gets into bed and snuggles in, Micah starts looking at books in his crib. All seems good. Before I go, Jack wants to be snuggled. I lay down facing him, our noses touching, breathing softly on each other, and I think - this isn't so bad.  A sweet kiss from my boy and I am off. I shut the door and head downstairs. 

Umm, 20 minutes later I am back upstairs because Micah is still crying.  Not winding down, I am getting sleepy, crying. But crazy, mad, come get me, "MAMA" crying.  Back in I go and sit down to rock Micah.  After more crying, lots of rocking, I finally hear deep breathing. I look down at my baby and he is asleep. I don't remember the last time I rocked him to sleep.  With the boys sharing a room they have always had a routine and then been put to bed awake. I rocked him for a few more minutes, kissed the top of his head, and put him in his bed.

Now I am back downstairs, computer on lap, TV on, and probably another 20 minutes before my husband is home. Not quite the night I had planned, but that is okay, in the ups and downs of our days, it was nice to have a brief moment of sweetness with each of my babies.  

Uh-oh, I just heard the garage door, that means my husband is home.  Alone time is over.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

Isn't that the best kind of plans gone awry? When the change brings a moment that you can treasure?